Interview: Crumpet the Elf gives us the scoop on The Santaland Diaries at Shakespeare & Co.

Synopsis of the Show: Fun-filled holiday cheer arrives at Shakespeare & Company December 3-30 as Artistic Director Tony Simotes hops back into the director’s saddle with The Santaland Diaries. Adapted by Joe Mantello from David Sedaris’s book of the same title, this one-man tour de force features Company actor Peter Davenport, who we interview here as Crumpet the Elf, and will run in the Elayne P. Bernstein Theatre. The Bernstein is wheelchair accessible and hearing aid assisted. Contact the Box Office at (413) 637-3353 or boxoffice@shakespeare.org to order tickets or learn more about discount availability, or order tickets from www.shakespeare.org.

This is certainly not a show for children who still believe in Santa, or want to. Instead it is the perfect destination for older Santa-wise children and those of us with PTSS: post traumatic santa syndrome. I for one have never recovered from the day that I learned that, not only is Santa a myth, but that my very own parents were capable of lying to their own trusting children.

"Santa thinks of all of us as one big family. And he hopes everyone will love others as much as they love themselves. All photos by Kevin Sprague."

So come with Shakespeare & Company as we go back to those days of innocence, and talk with Peter…oops, I mean Crumpet the elf. It’s a show that will give your Christmas new meaning.

For now, however, let’s see if he can give you a flavor of what is to come. I place a call to Crumpet (actor Peter Davenport) and asked him to tell us the secrets of the roly-poly man in the red suit, and how he can bend time to make personal visits to all the billions of children in the world in just one night.

“What a perfect day to call,” Peter answers, “there’s snow on the ground in Williamstown, and it is making me feel all festive…” He slowly moves into his character of Crumpet. I suggest that from the Sedaris story, Crumpet seems perplexed by the whole business of Christmas. “True, at least until the end when he has an epiphany.” I admitted that I had not heard the original tale when David Sedaris first read it on NPR. “Good, then you won’t be comparing me to the author of the written word, instead of the actor of the performed word.

Peter Davenport will even get to sing a couple of songs, an unexpected bonus. His second solo CD is soon to be released.

“Tony Simotes, our director (and head of Shakespeare & Company) takes Santaland in a whole different direction since each production and actor can put a very personal stamp on it. I am not trying to be David Sedaris, or to recreate Winter Wonderland, as an over-the-top sort of thing. Tony and I are trying to humanize the whole story so it is more like an Andy Williams Christmas where the audience feels welcomed into our house.” Ah, pretty sneaky I would say, making the audience all cozy and warm before the twists and turns begin. Can hardly wait.

With a handful of holiday questions submitted by friends and readers I asked Peter to assume his role of Crumpet for me and answer them. I explained that my friends figured him to be their best chance at getting the truth, since he is so close to Santa. “I am close to many Santas, some of whom I prefer to keep my distance from, but it is all in a workday,” Peter shot back.

Gin, with a twist.

What snack does Santa like to find left for him? Is it milk and cookies or a shot of gin?

That depends on which Santa you are talking to. Overall, though, it is definitely milk and cookies. Save that shot of gin for myself. I need all the liquid courage I can muster to push him back up that darn chimney.

Does he really check his list twice, or does he use a computer now?

You know, Santa is old school. He is about 617 years old and doesn’t take to change easily. And all us elves are pretty sure he is lying on the younger side, as we all do. But the real problem is that his eyes aren’t so good, so checking the list twice is an understatement. Along with his eyes, his memory isn’t quite as good either.

How did Santa get to be Santa?

"Santa makes Christmas so much fun!"

Some people think he is like the Dalai Lama and was born into Santadom, but I don’t think he was. The whole Santa backstory is pretty close lipped and it is hard to get close enough to him to find out the truth. It’s best to approach him when it’s a non-holiday. And that’s when that gin comes in real handy, too.

How many elves work for Santa?

Do you want me to include the sweatshop elves? If you want me to include them all that could be a problem, since they are not on the books, you see. And I don’t want to get anyone in trouble.

What happens if an elf or a reindeer gets sick?

We try not to, though I personally get sick and tired quite often.

When I was in Finland I got to pet some reindeer, and even had a reindeer burger. Are you allowed to pet the reindeer?

We’re allowed to pet them but not allowed to eat them.

Elves shoes are a touchy subject.

Those funny shoes that elves wear, are they custom made or off the shelf.

I think that is a baiting question, there is nothing funny about our shoes, sir. They are very stylish.

Does Santa have any brothers or sisters?

Well, he considers everyone his brother and sister. He really thinks of all of us as one big family. And he hopes everyone will love others as much as they love themselves.

Why do the elves wear tights?

We do a lot of running around and the tights help us keep warm when we have to go from inside out into all that snow. They also help us be really nimble, like when we have to slide across the floor to get stuff. Doing that with bare legs can be quite painful. Splinters and all that, you know.

"Not everyone can be an elf, you know..."

Jobs are scarce these days, are you hiring, what does Santa look for?

Well, anyone can apply, but you have to show us you are good with other elves and most people fall short in that area. We also have to be good with parents, and that’s a real talent. Of course, if the people skills are in short supply, there are plenty of jobs behind the scenes too. Just not as glamorous.

Do elves have a philosophy of life?

Absolutely, First rule: nose to the grindstone. Second rule: Don’t let the big man get you down.

And what do elves do on their day off?

On their what…what’s a day off?

Every week you are supposed to get two days off.

Oh, we don’t go by people calendars or “weeks” and I think our days are a little bit longer . Could be because there is no sun at the North Pole this time of year. and I am on the night shift.

"A day off? First I ever heard of it. Santa keeps secrets, you know."

This year I learned that many WalMarts, K-Marts and other chain stores were actually open for business all day on Thanksgiving, so their employees couldn’t spend time with their families. Isn’t that shocking?

Well, welcome to my world. No time off even with good behavior.

Thanks, Crumpet!

Peter Davenport in Williamstown

Peter Davenport’s background in the performing arts is amazingly diverse as he moved from dance to song to acting, all the while keeping an eye on business opportunities. Despite forays into New York and California, he keeps up the Cole Porter estate where he lives and its six bay carriage house with its two suites and a barn which are for rent and popular both winter and summer. The website he has created for Buxton Hill is quite seductive. Ski resorts are but a short drive down Route 7, and the Berkshires continue to offer lots of cultural experiences during the winter. Shakespeare & Company is about 45 minutes from his house.

About Santaland Diaries

The Santaland Diaries is the occasionally subversive, alarmingly clever, engagingly poignant and always side-splittingly funny true account of Mr. Sedaris’ time spent working as a Christmas elf at Macy’s Department Store. The essay on which the play is based propelled Sedaris into the national spotlight when it was first published, and is now well on its way to becoming a modern holiday classic. After applying for the position as a gag job, our slacker-hero is suddenly thrown into a world of tinsel, fake snow, Santas who are more naughty than nice, and all the cringe-worthy trappings of the Macy’s Christmas display. Although our reluctant protagonist (aka, “Crumpet the Elf”) guides us through this yuletide nightmare with a wryly satiric attitude, even he may eventually find himself filled with holiday cheer, thanks to the kind influence of the final Santa to join the Macy’s team. A true tale of redemption and good will, The Santaland Diaries is a hilarious depiction of what the modern holidays are all about.

Tony Simotes

“We’ve had a more than terrific fall season with Stoppard’s wacky and rollicking The Real Inspector Hound,” adds Simotes. “And as the leaves disappear and the snow starts to fly we want to invite audiences in from the cold to warm their hearts — and bodies — with even more fun and belly laughs with The Santaland Diaries, a truly modern-day classic from the incomparable David Sedaris.”

Peter Davenport (l) and Tony Simotes work out a scene.

“It’s been such great fun working with Peter Davenport in this first week of rehearsals,” continues Simotes. “He brings a lot of humor, spontaneity, wit and a myriad of talents to the role — in fact we are going to be showcasing Peter’s incredible singing voice in the production to add just a few more ounces of joy into this Holiday production. Who knows even the audience may play a role and join in the singing as well! And although the show has a mature take on Christmas, Peter and I want to ensure that everyone leaves the theatre happy and ready to enjoy all that the Holiday’s have to offer. There’s a spirit in the play that reminds me of the great clowns in Shakespeare. Touchstone, Feste, and even Puck are early proto-types of Sedaris’ Crumpet the Elf. Wry wit and a little slapstick all add up to an ironic evening of laughs, song and memories…we hope.”

Founding member and Artistic Director Tony Simotes has been with S&Co. for thirty-threeseasons. Tony is a Master Teacher of Fight and Movement and has been one of the Company’s Artistic Associates since 1995. S&Co Director: Othello, Hound of the Baskervilles, The Merry Wives of Windsor, A Midsummer Nights Dream, As You Like It, and Two Gentlemen of Verona.

Attention to detail: Costume Designer Govane Lohbauer, Director Tony Simotes and actor Peter Davenport focus on the costume.

He’s been an Associate Director and Fight Director on many of Tina Packer’s shows over the years and together they have created some of the Company’s most inspired productions. His work as a fight choreographer and director has been featured from coast to coast from the Mark Taper Forum in Los Angeles to the New York Shakespeare Festival’s Public Theater. Recent directing credits include: Director of War of the Worlds which was broadcast live on Wisconsin Public Radio for the 75th anniversary of the Orson Wells presentation that panicked a nation; The Nerd for Madison Repertory Theatre and Fight Direction for Macbeth at Orlando Shakespeare Theatre. Internationally his work has been featured at The Stage X Festival in Brisbane Australia, The Canadian Stage Company in Toronto and in Vancouver at Theater 48 New Play Festival, just to name a few.

He also created a relationship with Raven Soft Ware of Madison, Wisconsin for the training of actors in Motion Capture Acting and voice-over’s for Raven’s game technology division. Mr. Simotes also works as an actor and is a proud member of AEA, SAG and AFTRA. Film roles include: Terminator II, Hot Shots, Alien Nation, The Waterdance, Pacific Heights, Maid to Order, A Class Act, Whose Life is It Anyway, and a starring role in the Academy Award nominated Bronx Cheers. TV: “Buddy Rich” for CBS’ Sinatra mini-series, fight choreography for ABC News “What would you do?” with John Quinones, and many other prime-time shows. Mr. Simotes spent seven wonderful years at the University of Wisconsin–Madison where he was a full professor and Director of University Theatre.

Peter Davenport

The dapper Peter Davenport sets up the play with the audience. All photos by Kevin Sprague.

The Santaland Diaries marks Peter Davenport’s third season with S& Co. where his other credits include, All’s Well That Ends Well (Amor Dumaine), Scenes From An Execution (Admiral Sufficci, staged reading). Nat’l Tour: The Sound Of Music (Captain Georg von Trapp).

Regional: Lyric Stage Company:Kiss Me Kate (Fred Graham/Petruchio, IRNE nominated); New Rep Theatre: A Christmas Carol (Bob Cratchitt); Williamstown Theatre Festival: Our Town (Howie Newsome, staged reading); The Fools’ Theatre:The Libertine (George Etherege). This fall Peter performed in Arkansas Repertory Theatre’s production of Evitain the role of the Aristocrat, and as the understudy for Juan Peróne.  He has done numerous television & film projects as well as countless television and radio commercials and voice over work.

He is currently working on his second solo CD of Cole Porters’ music, a follow up to his popular Clear Day release. Please visit www.peter-davenport.com to read more about Peter’s upcoming projects.

David Sedaris

A master of satire and social critique, David Sedaris has become one of America’s most beloved writers of humor over the last two decades. Sedaris is the author of Barrel Fever and Holidays on Ice, as well as collections of personal essays, Naked, Me Talk Pretty One Day, Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim, and When You Are Engulfed in Flames, each of which became a bestseller. Sedaris’s pieces appear regularly in The New Yorker, and he is a frequent contributor to This American Life, distributed nationally by Public Radio International. His newest book, a collection of fables entitled Squirrel Seeks Chipmunk: A Modest Bestiary (with illustrations by Ian Falconer), was scheduled to be published in September 2010.